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June 06, 2003

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randomreader

turning 26 later this year myself, and at first i have to admit it seemed a little heavy, but if every 26 year old in the world was meant to give up happy hours, road trips, playing hooky, and can I mention drinking way too much on a Thursday night (at said happy hour) - the world would be a pretty f'n boring place

here's to not growing up for one more year...

Happy Birthday!

TxtbkHistrionic

By way of the Tucker Max site I have stumbled upon your own site, For all the guilt-trips laid on me when I whined about turning 26, nearly a year ago, it is so refreshing to see that other 'younger' women are not above fretting over their impending birthdays, as well.

The year leading up to 26 was definitely one of those 'crisis' years where I felt I had to live out every dream, desire, and fantasy, as though I were in my dying days. I should probably mention it was also one incredibly fun, fulfilling and life-changing year. Admittedly, I went a little crazy trying to hold onto my "youth," so to speak, but at the time, I needed to believe I would always be able to look back and know I spent it well.

I think 26 disturbs many of us because it puts us into the "late twenties" category. There are the "early-twenties," rarely any mention of "mid-twenties" (it always seems like lying about your weight on your drivers license when you say MID-anything, even when it is true.) Anyway, I digress, by passing 25, we are no longer able to align ourselves with the college crowd, and as women we are often alarmed by the looming thought that no one would be taken aback were we to pop out a little 7 pound bundle of responsibility.

At its core, 26 implies responsibility and stability and while there are some women who embrace these new concepts, much like they do their cookie-cutter fiancés--these women appear to have been waiting all their lives for this point, where the happy ending falls into place. I can't judge them for it or argue that my way is better, but a year ago, I was horrified by the possibility that I might have to buy into that dream of settling down simply to avoid becoming the "old raspy-voiced chick in the bar ogling frat boys" or the "bitter businesswoman whose employees make catty remarks about her need for a good lay." 26 suggests that, as women, it is time to either buy into the agreed upon path to happiness and reshape our lives accordingly, or fall prey to those who will label us with one of many gender-based stereotypes. Inherently, I knew/know I will never be the old woman at the end of the bar, and I refuse to stop the happy hours and the late-Thursday nights for fear of it. As for the bitter businesswoman, well, if that is all I've got to scare me into settling down for the first tool with a Masters Degree and a "way with children," then I've got more to worry about than just turning 26.

So, my 25th year was filled with hedonism, laughs, chaos, liquor, passionate lovers, sensational friends, uplifting conversations and incredible success. I'll be 27 in August and I've recently quit smoking, started running and limited myself to dating only those that appeal to me for more than the free dinner. Why? Not for 27. I just began to realize that as much as I loved that last year before I became a woman in her late twenties, well, I'll look like I'm 40 any day now, if I try to keep it up another few years. (Okay, the limiting the dating was merely because it got tiresome coming up with diplomatic ways to express my disinterest at continuing to date someone upon realizing their many, many shortcomings. It had nothing to do with my looks) I still drink like a sailor, play poker with the boys, run around town at all hours of the night, regardless of whether or not I've got an 8AM meeting, and place my career before any man that enters my life. I just look good doing it and that seems to be the only difference, it's a little bit harder to maintain that.

From the little I've seen of your site, you're clearly a beautiful, fascinating, witty and infectiously happy woman. Hold onto all of that. 26 ain't nothin, bucko. Take it from me, I've been there, done that. Go into this next year with dignity and zeal and do it your way, not mine---if you want the husband, then I commend you for realizing it, but just don't ever believe you have to reevaluate the things that make you happy to be a happy grown-up. You'll survive just fine and if you're a wee bit petty like me, just place all your worries in the hands of a good plastic surgeon in about 10 years and you'll be good to go. (God, I wish I was kidding on that one.)

(Sorry for rambling, I guess I felt like 'sharing,' or just procrastinating the work I should be doing to validate working overtime. Good luck.)

ps did I mention Happy Birthday?

Kelly's not-so-little brother

Nice site you've got here, just thought I'd drop by and wish you a happy birthday. Can't wait to see the coconut bra pictures. -Scott

kristin

i can't stop thinking that my common law partner can control my mind and body and it is making me feel like life isn't real and there is always a little voice in my head everytime i try to say "be rational" the voice says what if he's just making you think that or making you say that ? please help me

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